No one likes going through a break-up. Heartache aside, there’s finances, moving out, and the kids. But is breaking up really the answer? It’s ubiquitous for couples to go through a rough patch, and sometimes this can help. So when you consider breaking up or going through a trial separation, it can give you a little perspective.
Unless you really need to, you can use the time to consider how you can fix a relationship rather than breaking up. It’s common for couples to eventually realize just how much they need and love each other following a minor separation. Of course, anyone will tell you that sustaining a relationship is hard and takes work. But before calling a divorce lawyer, consider that there might be multiple ways to fix it.
Communicate with Each Other
Vital to the success of any relationship is communication. So place all cards on the table and talk it out. Take the time to sit down allay every concern you both have. All the things that tick you off, and how you feel should be laid bare. And you should listen to all of these from your partner as well. If you don’t know what each other is thinking and feeling, you cannot possibly hope to move forward with a relationship.
Be Open and Honest About Everything
No relationship can stand on lies and secrets. Almost everyone has secrets, and some are incredibly personal. But that’s the beauty of being with a loving and accepting partner; you can both be who you are with each other. Financial matters, past affairs, sexual preferences, and childhood events should all be discussed. Essentially, when you have no secrets, forgiveness and moving forward are in reach.
Find Common Ground
There will always be things that get in the way. Money, lifestyle, and religion are common issues that couples can face. But these can always be worked on. The trick is in equal compromise and not letting one partner have more or less than they deserve. You are both in the relationship, and therefore you both need your own things in life. Perhaps your partner can watch the sports game with their friends every Friday night, so long as they make time for you every Saturday.
Make Time for Each Other’s Needs
Moving on from that, making time is extremely important. The whole point of being in a relationship is to feel loved, wanted, and accepted. To share your life with someone else, good and bad, ups and downs, better or worse. We all have needs. Food, water, and shelter aside, love and acceptance are essential for mental and physical health. So spend time with each other, make love and help and guide each other.
Plan for the Future
Trying to move past relationship issues is a gradual process of healing the soul. First, take comfort in each other, make equal compromises and establish trust. Then you can begin to move forward in life. Sharing a common goal can be a great benefit when working on your relationship. Discuss what you both need and want from life and plan how you can both achieve it. Think of your career goals, life aspirations, and whether you want children. These can be of great comfort on the worst days.
I hope these tips helped if you’re going through a tough time in your relationship and needed some pointers on how to fix it or get out of it.
Always Remember You’re Beautiful!
-Lola
